Parent Involvement: Finding My Place Without a Seat at the Table

I’m not on Parent Council. I’ve often considered it—usually after being at a school event and seeing all the other moms bustling about with clipboards and big smiles—but life always seems too busy. Between work, endless to-do-around-the-house lists, and getting the kids to “all of the things”, I figured I wasn’t cut out for meetings and event planning.

Still, I do want to feel connected to my kids’ school, to understand what is going on beyond the endless stream of rubrics to initial and hot lunch orders to fill out. So, when the school sent out an invitation to a local fast food restaurant for a fundraiser, I decided to check it out. Seemed pretty tame—probably just a quick in-and-out, grab my food and go. 

But when I got there, it was something else entirely. It looked like the whole school had turned up in the parking lot. So many familiar faces, people greeting each other and catching up. My youngest made a beeline for a group of friends in the restaurant leaving me in the parking lot with the other grown ups.

Walking in to finally place an order, I struck up a conversation with another mom. She asked if I was on the parent council. “Oh no, not me,” I laughed. “I’m just here for the french fries.” She smiled and said, “Oh! Well this fundraiser was the parent council’s idea! They made it happen.”

It hit me then. These were regular parents, probably just as busy as me, finding little ways to create something special for our kids. I didn’t need to sit in meetings to appreciate their work—or even to be part of it.

Back at home, I found myself chatting with my son about who he’d run into and what they talked about. He was animated and happy, and for once, I didn’t have to pull answers out of him. It was fun for him to see so many people from his school getting dinner together with their families.

Such a simple idea made so many people smile and, at least for us, was a change of pace and scenery. And I didn’t even have to do anything! 

Sometimes, it’s as simple as showing up, attending events, or just asking, “What can I do?” That night, I realized that connection doesn’t always require a commitment (although that’s important too!); sometimes, all it takes is being present.

In the latest Beyond the Bell podcast, host Chantelle Quesnelle speaks with Tarra Madigan, Simcoe Muskoka Catholic District School Board’s Catholic Parent Involvement Committee (CPIC) co-chair. Their conversation is about parent involvement in schools and how it doesn’t have to be terribly complicated to be beneficial.

Chantelle: You spoke earlier Tarra, about how there’s a lot of different ways for parents to get involved in their child’s school or school community. What recommendations do you have for how they could get involved if they feel like parent council meetings might not be a good fit?

Tarra: Sometimes it’s just as simple as making a phone call to your school’s office admin and saying “Hey, can I do something? What can I do that would help.” Getting involved doesn’t always have to be a formal, “oh, this is my role” kind of thing. You do have to have a title in something to be something, just being happy to attend those events and engaging with the kids. Sometimes that’s more than enough.

Chantelle: Yes! It’s always wonderful seeing families come together and come say hi at different events - you certainly see parents connecting with parents, and friends meeting up in the school yard or in the halls and you get to witness the sense of community that being created. So attending those events that the school puts on is so important as well.

I may not have a seat at the council table, but that doesn’t mean I can’t find a way to contribute. Showing up, sharing a moment, and connecting with other parents and families is all part of building a stronger school community.

Next time the call for volunteers goes out, I might raise my hand. Because while I might not have a clipboard or a committee title, I’ve realized I don’t need one to make a difference. Sometimes, finding your place is about stepping into the existing spaces, no matter how small, and simply showing up.